Modesty

Is there anyone reading this who wouldn’t like to see MODESTY return to our culture? It seems that TMI has become the rule of the day. “Over-sharing” is now a thing. “Over-exposed” used to mean casting too much light onto a negative when taking a picture, or burning the image too long into the photo-paper when you printed the picture. Those terms sound like they should be something to avoid; yet, they seem to have become common goals in our social-media driven culture. Modesty in any form has become itself a cultural wrong. 

You don’t wear short-shorts? What’s wrong with you? A one piece bathing suit… without cutouts or see-through bits; and with a cover up too? You must be Taliban or something? You’re single and don’t have sex? Something’s wrong with you You’re Christian and straight but don’t loudly preach it and condemn gays? You’re not Christian enough. You’re gay and don’t shout it from the rooftops? You’re ashamed. You’re a liberal? You’re wrong-headed! You’re a conservative? You’re an idiot! Why aren’t you sharing post-coital selfies? You’re a prude! You PRAY before meals? What planet are you from?

Frankly, I’m tired of knowing what’s going on in anyone’s bedroom. I’m tired of the government and the too-cool-for-God, too-connected-for-compassion world trying to see into other people’s personal and private lives. I’m tired of being made to feel there’s something not right in me because I won’t make my private life into public entertainment. 

Just look at reality TV. Is there anything about it that’s not just plain mortifying? When did mortifying become entertainment?

What happened to having just a few, select friends you could count on to be there for you and to inspire you to be better person. What in our culture is failing people that they now need to make every aspect of life into a public and humiliating spectacle? 

Be A Friend To Make A Friend

"Be a friend to make a friend” ~by D. Denise Dianaty
Friendship Devotional Philosophies

Image from
BibleEncyclopedia.com

“Be joyful in hope, patient in affliction, faithful in prayer. Share with the Lord's people who are in need. Practice hospitality.” 

– NIV Romans 12:12-13

We’ve all felt the exclusion of our peers, as kids (and, sadly, as adults) and seen our “friends” look away or even join in our exclusion not to be themselves excluded. We may even have done the same. But, what a stunning memory is that friend who takes our part, stands with us, facing down that risk of being excluded themselves. Shares a kind word, lifts us up, and reminds us that there is joy and hope in the world for us too. This is when we begin to understand true friendship. 

– NIV Romans 12:12, “Be joyful in hope ...”

Other times, when life seems to be an ever burdening weight, a friend will commiserate with you, share their own burdens with you and try to help you carry yours. We learn our understanding of friendship and the fulfillment we receive from it in knowing that we are not alone in our suffering. We are lifted out of our misery little by little by the love and compassion of friends, and by learning to look outside ourselves to uplift those around us with our own love and compassion. We learn that we are stronger and together. 

– NIV Romans 12:12, “... patient in affliction ...”

Then, the simple act of prayer, of knowing someone is dedicated to our needs and lifts us up in prayer gives us hope and strength. And praying for others, lightens our own hearts and teaches us that, sometimes, a still and listening heart will lift us up and create bonds that last a lifetime. 

– NIV Romans 12:12, “... faithful in prayer.”

What greater act of friendship is there than to have a friend stand shoulder to shoulder, without expectation, to help us in our need? What more telling reflection of Christian example could we possible exhibit than to be that friend who steps up? 

– NIV Romans 12:13, “Share with the Lord’s people who are in need ...”

Perhaps the most personal act of friendship we can exhibit is to invite someone into our homes. It’s such an intimate act of trust between friends. To be invited into a person’s home is an invitation into their lives. To reciprocate is an acknowledgment of that person’s friendship. Inviting someone into our home is taking down those walls we all build to protect ourselves from the hurts of this world. The simple act of hospitality is an act of trust, of belief in the better nature we want to see in humanity. 

– NIV Romans 12:13, “Practice hospitality.”

Finally, together, we are stronger and in that strength, we can do more and share more of the love of Christ with all the world. What greater expression of our friends and our friendships than that we support each other and work together to do good in the world.

– Hebrews 13:16 “And do not forget to do good and to share with others, for with such sacrifices God is pleased.”

I put this together a long time ago. I’ve lost track of what my inspiration and sources were, other than the noted scriptures. These are just some observations and philosophies on friendship I chose to share.

D. Denise Dianaty
© 07 June 2015

Pick up your own copy of my first book of poetry, entitled My Life In Poetry at D. Denise Dianaty

Poem: “To the Me That Was…”

A commentary in poetical form to myself at the age of thirteen, when things were at their worst and despair seemed to be the only future ahead…

You there… yes… you

You’re the me that was.

I’m the me who’ll be you.

A chance to end is lost.

No love behind her gate…

Another year has gone.

Just lost… lost in her hate…

Beaten down… down… down… done.

I know you wanna die.

Think you’ll end all the lies.

Again secreted the tools… sigh

The means of your demise…

Starving yourself to perfect

some ideal upon you shamed,

with no one near to protect

from her vision on you profaned.

Another Summer’s on the horizon

At hand now’s a short reprieve

Don’t despair… she never won

Off to Gran’s where love you’ll receive

These Summers are your respite

from the unremitting torment.

In those halcyon days will joy flit,

until home again you must be sent.

You’ll survive her madness

and leave her insanity behind.

Life will shine for you, I promise,

Coming to you, a heart and eyes so kind.

I swear to you, by all Heaven,

More love and joy will come

Than all the suffering she’ll leaven.

For each dark day, a hundred in the sun…

Love and joy so much better

Than you can imagine of a lover

Pressed down, shaken together…

I pledge… yes, and running over… 

Whispered kisses and a healing space…

A lover strong and kind and bright…

A gentle heart of endless grace…

Ebony eyes will shine with Love’s light…

They will shine only for you 
and for the person you will become in me.

by D. Denise Dianaty

© 19 November 2014 MomzillaNC

Pick up your own copy of my first book of poetry, entitled My Life In Poetry at D. Denise Dianaty